Ever since I can remember, I was an Odd Duck. Physically I looked fine, but my unique qualities were internal. I was just cut from a different cloth. My perspective on life was never mainstream and my dream life appeared abruptly different from my peers. So what’s a visionary to do?
My reoccurring thought until my mid-thirties was to try to fit in. Over my lifespan, I attempted to fit in with the Popular Girls, the Church Ladies, the Homeschool Moms, the Gymnastic Moms, the Stay-At-Moms, and the Working Women. All attempts ended in me being the Odd Duck out. No matter how hard I tried to fit, there was always a reason these women ended up hating me. Hating Me!
The emotional pain and mental anguish of trying to figure out why and the effects of peer rejection wore off around the age of 33. Then came the period of acceptance that I am just not everyone’s cup of tea. They didn’t have to like me, it’s their personal preference. However, I realized that in most of these instances the women involved were malicious in how they treated me. I am no victim, but the term “Haters” exists for a reason.
See in this world you have “Haters” and “The Hated On”. I am a tribal member of
“The Hated On” tribe. It took me a whole lifetime to get it.
“Haters” are not mythical creatures and you are not on your job unless you have a few. See whenever I grind or hustle real hard to achieve my dreams, one mysteriously appears. Their sole assignment is to block, hinder or taint my vision. In time, I’ve learned to recognize the characteristics and tactics of “Haters”. By doing so, I have learned to avoid their traps and prevent them from affecting my progress. Here are the most common types of Haters.
Judas the Hater of Haters
This Hater is a spouse, close relative or best friend. They know you intimately because secretly they want to be you. However, they can be sneaky, back biting and self-absorbed. When you hit a low point, this gives them energy and they feel a sense of winning. They mislead you to believe that they care about you, deep down inside the hate runs deep. Their jealousy rears its ugly head from time to time in unhealthy was, but eventually, their true nature is revealed in explosive ways. If you walk away from the relationship, they become toxic and explosive. This Hater can be the most difficult to recognize because the work so hard to gain your trust. Don’t be misled by their perceived loyalty, they really want your dream to fail.
The Conductor and Orchestra
The Conductor is the mastermind behind a crew of Haters (the Orchestra). They schedule rehearsals to figure out how to play you. This often appears in the form of bullying or sabotage. They all have a vested interest in disliking you and coming together under the leadership of a Conductor of Hate only fuels their common interests. They are stronger and more aggressive together, but you must take down the Conductor in order identify everyone involved. They are strategic, well organized and cunning, so watch them closely.
They mostly hate on you from a distance, When they attack they are coming to end you. Since they plan to attack, they usually publicly try to humiliate you. It’s a master performance. Remember their common bond is hating you, their power is in numbers. So be prepared to dismantle the entire Orchestra, because a new Conductor can arise to take the place of the old one.
The Owner of Hating!
This is my favorite Hater because they don’t hide the fact that they are hating on you. They just say it and show it. This gives you the opportunity to recognize how they really fell and exit immediately. You understand that they are not on your side and will never have your best interest at heart. It’s best to know who you’re dealing with exactly so that you can deal with them accordingly.
On a final note, having Haters is healthy for you. It’s a sign that you are doing something right. Haters hate you because you possess something that they wish they had. It could be your confidence, your brains, your beauty, your muscle, your passion or success that triggers their negative emotions to you. Just keep moving forward no matter what they do, it will make you stronger.
I hope that this blog inspires you to “Face Your Fear and Fly”. Everyone has a purpose. Click on the link and download your free “Face Your Fear and Fly” workbook today!